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| Image by Stereo Shot / Stocksy |
While language habits can't definitively reveal someone's confidence, the way you speak can influence perceptions of your confidence level. If you find yourself apologizing unnecessarily or using filler words, here are five tips from a language expert to help you sound more confident in 2024.
A quick note: Language alone cannot determine confidence levels, but it's essential to be aware of the impressions your language may give off, especially in professional settings.
Beware of Stereotypes (Especially at Work)
Assertive language is often seen as confidence in men and aggression in women, creating a double bind. While you can't change societal norms, find a balance in your language and check biases when interpreting your colleagues' tone.
Tips to Speak with Confidence
1. Limit Unnecessary Apologies
Apologizing excessively may be viewed as a sign of insecurity. Replace unnecessary apologies with expressions of gratitude. For example:
"I'm sorry I'm late." → "Thank you for waiting to get started."
2. Be Direct in Your Requests
Clearly distinguish between favors and requests. Avoid indirectly giving directions when you mean an order. For instance:
"Can you do me a favor and lock the door when you leave?" → "I'm heading out. Be sure to lock the door when you leave."
3. Watch Your Uptalk
Avoid raising your voice at the end of a sentence, as it may make statements sound like questions. Maintain a level tone or explicitly ask a question. For instance:
"I'll get to this by the end of the day?" → "When do you need this by?"
4. Set a Time for Your Requests
Provide a realistic time frame for your requests, especially in the workplace. Adding a timestamp helps the other person assess their availability. For example:
"Can you send me the meeting notes soon?" → "I'll need the meeting notes by noon tomorrow. Does that work for you?"
5. Remember: It Takes Time
Changing your speech habits takes practice. Experiment with the tips, adapt them to your life, and seek feedback from friends. Confidence is a gradual development, so be patient with yourself.